Barbara Koch, community volunteer from Southold, dies at 83

Barbara Koch's funeral was so well-attended that people sat in choir seats and spilled into the halls of the church.

"She would have loved it. She loved to be surrounded by loads of people," said George Koch, her husband.

The longtime Southold resident died on Nov. 29 from a heart attack. She was 83.

Barbara Joan Koch was born on May 11, 1942, in Jackson Heights, Queens. She moved to Southold in 1950 and graduated from Southold High School in 1960. She then attended the Willford Academy Beauty School and went to work as a beautician with Village Hair Studio in Southold.

She met her future husband in the summer of 1958 at a local sweet shop. The couple married on Jan. 11, 1969, and raised four children, residing in Bayside from 1969 to 1973 before they moved back to Southold.

"She was the greatest mom that you could ever ask for, and she was unwavering despite having four daughters," said Koch's eldest daughter, Krista Koch, of Rock Hill, South Carolina, who served as her mother's nurse and caregiver for the last two and a half months of her life. "From Girl Scouts until we graduated from college, she made sure we got every experience possible. She was my best friend."

Another daughter, Libby Koch, of Greenport, called Koch a superhero.

"She was Superwoman. She was resilient, positive, and always reassured us that everything would be OK," Libby Koch said. "She was pretty notorious about saying, 'Be nice and slow down,' to everyone, and even held up a sign at a hockey game."

Koch's mission to spread kindness and bring joy to people was evident in her volunteer work at Stony Brook Eastern Long Island Hospital Auxiliary, where she logged 8,000 hours of dedicated service. She also founded the Ladies on the Links golf tournament, which each year raises thousands of dollars for the hospital.

"If someone needed help, she was the first one to raise her hand. ... And she was always worried about other people," said her husband. "She was honored when her name was placed on a plaque in the hospital, joining the handful of others who have reached this milestone."

Koch adored children and worked as a bus driver for Sunrise Coach in Greenport, driving in the Southold school district for about 20 years. According to her family, she was "ecstatic to become a grandmother."

"She was the best mom and nonna in the world. She loved her grandkids more than anything. The minute my firstborn arrived, she was on the next flight out to be here," said Koch's daughter Andrea Leonard, of Corona, California. "Anytime I needed her, she was here. She's missed beyond anything I could ever explain."

Koch was a member of the Holy Trinity Episcopal Church in Greenport, the Eastern Long Island Hospital Auxiliary, Southold American Legion Post 803 Auxiliary, the Eastern Star (Masonic Temple) and a member of the Island's End Golf & Country Club, where she served as a board member. She enjoyed swimming, gambling, golfing, shopping and cooking, but treasured time with her family the most.

"She loved to go to Foxwoods with her twin sister, Paula, and always wanted to feed anyone who came into the house. She loved her family and spending time with them," Koch said of his wife. "She would want to be remembered very simply as someone who was kind."

Funeral services were held Dec. 6 at Holy Trinity Episcopal Church, followed by a private cremation. In addition to her  husband  and daughters Krista, Libby and Andrea, she is survived by daughter Georgeann Craig (Patrick), of Salida, Colorado; grandchildren Andrew Leonard and Brandon Leonard; and sister Paula Thorp, of East Marion.