Should vacation rentals split by guest or room?

For friends and family members who vacation together, one topic can be more fraught than sex, politics or religion: how to split the cost of the rental.

In one corner, you have pay-per-person. In the other, pay-per-room. Both plans have defenders and detractors. And many travelers just aren’t sure.

Jonathan Levitt, 35, of Colorado, was debating the topic with his girlfriend last year ahead of a group trip to Arizona when he posted the question on social media.

The answers included the standard per person or per room, but also per family or per bathroom - or per person, but discounted for the friend who had to buy a plane ticket. One person wrote: “Get a hotel room!”

“We both kind of couldn’t figure out why the other person felt that way,” said Levitt, a consultant and host of the podcast “For the Long Run.”

Singles, who often feel as if they are subsidizing the couples and families in their travel group, typically prefer a per-person arrangement. In this scenario, each guest contributes to the pot, including children who are not old enough to run a lemonade stand. (Their parents float them the cash till they are financially independent.)

Multiples sharing a bedroom may support the per-room position, claiming they should pay for the space, not the number of bodies inside it. Paying per-person could be construed as a slumber party tariff.

The calculations can become more complicated if you factor in room size or trappings, such as a whirlpool tub or an ocean-view balcony. Or if a guest departs early or makes significantly less than the rest of the group.

To help us settle the Great Vacation Rental Debate, we asked Google’s AI tool which payment structure is the most egalitarian. “Paying per room is generally considered the most standard and fair approach for vacation rentals,” it stated.

But AI has never had to share a bathroom with five people. So, we invited several experts to weigh in.

Team per person

Reid Kennedy, an Airbnb host in St. Paul, Minnesota, didn’t mince words. He said group activities often go better when there is equal investment.

“Gotta keep it simple and pay per person,” he said in a text message. “That way, everyone has the same financial investment and avoids any resentment.”

Diane Gottsman, an etiquette expert and founder of the Protocol School of Texas, aligns with the per-person approach as long as the rooms are identical. If they vary in size, views or bathroom access, the person with the larger or swankier room should pay more.

“If a guest is sleeping on a pull-out bed and everyone else has their own room, it would be considerate to take that into consideration when divvying up the bill and give that person a break,” Gottsman said by email.

Additionally, if the group has to upgrade to a pricier property to accommodate a friend’s specific needs, such as bunk beds for their children or a yard for their dog, then those folks should pitch in more.

Makarand Mody, an associate professor of hospitality marketing at Boston University, said a half-and-half split between families traveling together is reasonable, but dividing per person makes sense for a mixed group of adults. In an email, he said he can see why the question is the subject of debate.

“The underlying issue is that people are not only evaluating the math; they are evaluating whether the arrangement feels fair relative to what everyone is receiving,” said Mody, who studies sharing-economy platforms like Airbnb.

To keep the debate from turning into a rift, vacationing pals should agree on their strategy before they book.

“A clear process upfront can prevent resentment later,” Mody said.

Team per person, per night

When dicing up the bill, Jon Bittner, CEO and co-founder of the expense-sharing app Splitwise, takes a more holistic approach, considering the entire home, not just the beds.

“A vacation rental is more than just a place to sleep. Guests are also sharing common spaces like kitchens, bathrooms, living rooms, outdoor areas and the overall experience of the destination,” Bittner said by email. “A per-person, per-night split reflects that, and it also makes the cost lower for everyone else when someone brings a partner, family member or friend.”

Team bid on it

Sally French, lead writer at NerdWallet, voiced a similar argument on “this very spicy debate,” reminding guests that they are paying for the common spaces, too.

When negotiating amounts, she said, vacationers should be sensitive to any disparities in personal finances. A working couple, for instance, could have twice the income of a single person.

To bridge any differences in rooms, French recommended auctioning off the sleeping quarters.

“If all the rooms are equal, then it’s fair to do it that way [per person]. But in a vacation rental where you have the primary bedroom with a big suite and private balcony, and a sad, tiny room that could be an office, then the bidding-style really makes sense.”

Team per room (kind of)

John Y. Campbell, an economics professor at Harvard, supported this position on the grounds that a rental house can fit more people if everyone shares a room, so “it would be foolish to charge purely by the guest.”

However, he conceded that the higher the number of guests, the greater the congestion in shared spaces, such as bathrooms and the kitchen. His solution: tack on a surcharge for the extra person. According to his calculations, two people occupying one room should pay 1.2 to 1.5 times as much as a single person.

Washington Post personal finance columnist Michelle Singletary has written about dealing with vacation freeloaders. She said vacationers need to discuss the plan ahead of time, have consideration for other parties’ financial situations and collect the money up front.

She recommends splitting the cost per room, including taxes, tips and cleaning fees; she said people who are sharing a room should split that room’s cost. The formula can vary: If someone is getting a larger space, it’s reasonable to ask them to pay more. On the flip side, Singletary said it’s fair for the group to ask the person with the least-desirable sleeping setup to contribute less.

“The key is to factor in a lot and everyone can share what they think is fair and then vote on it,” she said in a message. “If someone is unhappy about the situation, speak up or forever hold your peace, or get your own hotel room near the shared vacation home.”

The verdict

The consensus among most of our experts is to pay per person per night - with an asterisk. Adjust the amount if the rooms are vastly different in size or amenities. Of course, use the format that works best for your group dynamic and that will ensure another vacation.